Spiraling into the Center

Spiraling into the center
The center of the shield
Spiraling into the center
The center of the shield
I am the weaver
I am the woven one
I am the dreamer
I am the dream
I am the weaver
I am the woven one
I am the dreamer
I am the dream

—words & music by Lorna Kohler, ©1989–2016

The Story

I am with a group of women, some of us mothers, all of us daughters. We sit in silence together. We listen to each other’s stories. One woman suggests making shields.

I have been wondering what to do with the shirts I wore when I was pregnant: three embroidered blouses from India, white, turquoise, and golden yellow; two of striped cotton, white, blue and yellow, red, green and blue; a plaid smock from Guatemala with an embroidered wool panel across the top of gathered cloth woven from red, green, blue, and white threads. I know I will not wear them again. I want to honor these garments and give new form to the creative energy they contain. They will become my shield.

My daughters and I walk into the garden. They help me choose a branch from a rose bush and watch me cut it with a knife. Thorns pierce my fingertips as I curve the wood into a hoop. One by one, I grasp each shirt and tear it into strips. I tie the strips around the hoop, covering the wood and the thorns. The colors spiral, over and under, as I weave the strips, forming a circular fabric with ragged ends around a hole in the center of the shield.

My older daughter observes, “It’s not finished yet.”

I braid the ends, linking them at the center by buttoning the cuff of the embroidered golden yellow blouse. Stepping back, I see the head and body of a fetus in the open spaces between the braids, one long turquoise cord connected to the umbilicus in the center.

Filled with the rhythm and wonder of making the shield, I dream of seeing words written in blazing golden light:

“I am the weaver I am the woven one I am the dreamer I am the dream”

Informed by the weaving, I add, “Spiraling into the center, the center of the shield” and listen for the tune. Gestures come, and steps: a circle dance of the making of the shield, alternating between initiating and receiving, spiraling in and spiraling out. The next summer, I teach the song and the dance to a circle of women and men on the University of California Santa Cruz campus, overlooking Monterey Bay. From there, the song flies around the world. I make a recording of Spiraling into the Center and eleven other original songs and copy right all of them in 1989.

Spiraling into the Center—© 1989 Lorna Kohler